DNF at mile 65

Firstly, thank you SO MUCH for all the supportive messages, calls, and well wishes. Each and every note filled me with a smile. I'm full of gratitude for my pacers, crew, and all the strangers at aid stations and fellow runners for encouragement. I am so privileged to have such a vast and wonderful community. 🩷✨🌱

Update on the run:

TLDR: I had an epic and incredible day, even though it wasn’t the ending I was hoping for. I stopped at around mile 65 due to internal system shutdowns.

I felt my lungs and chest burning in the first few miles on the steep climb up Mt. Werner (more than they had been in recent training). It was dusty, dry, and the air quality was poor as I could see a layer of smoke and haze over the mountains from the summit of Mt. Werner at mile 6.

I also began belching in these very early miles and the running and jostling and eating as much food as possible didn't sit well, but I was managing and mostly feeling as great as one could feel.

The burning in my lungs never went away and I realized whenever I wanted to yawn, I was entirely unable to get a full breath. The chest burning and shallow breathing intensified as I climbed up Lane of Pain around mile 52. The climbing combined with the abrasive cold air of night added insult to injury, but I slowly made my way up.

My GI system had begun its decline (likely from overwhelming it with significantly more carbs than it was used to and under training my gut muscles) maybe around mile 47.

When I rolled into Olympian Hall around mile 65 my coughing fits were nasty (unlimited supply of chunky green/yellow phlegm) and the compounding effects of shallow breathing was clearly limiting my oxygen intake. “I can’t breathe!”

My GI system was in complete rebellion as I was unable to take in food or water while moving without it instantly coming out the other end. Eventually, the stomach cramping & spasm-ing turned into the dry heaving version of diarrhea.

Ultimately, I’m more happy and proud of my efforts than any other emotion. Of course, I’m sad my insides went into full freak out mode preventing me from day 2, but I had an amazing 18-hour, 65-mile mountain run with other people as crazy as me.

The pain cave wasn’t what stopped me and yes, my muscles hurt and I have blisters. But, these more superficial/temporary issues are expected during a 100-mile event (as is the GI stuff). The lung shutdown was toying with longer-term health concerns and I felt I was a shade away from hacking up blood.

Pushing my lungs further was not worth the health risks for a race finish. My legs were fine. I know I can run 100 miles, and I was well ahead of my anticipated finish time. My muscles said yes while my lungs said no. The inhalers stopped helping and I was in a hole I couldn’t get out of. I had been here before three years ago in the Grand Canyon. Continuing felt irresponsible, so I made the devastating decision to pull the plug.

However, this show-stopper limitation was only a slice of the pie  out of my overall experience, which was overwhelmingly incredible and beautiful. I am proud of getting to the start line, for how well I moved, and how relatively comfortable I feel in ultra distance running. To some degree, I know I am made for ultras. I have a gift for endurance and ability to manage pain and suffering. And, in the same vein, I need to figure out my respiratory issues before planning the next thing. It can take months to reach homeostasis again after these bronchospasm attacks and I hope I can get to the bottom of it so I can redeem myself and figure out the next thing. Thank you all for your support!